[South Sudan] Part Deux


As I'm writing this down on my way to Juba, I still can't forget the mixed emotions I felt during the past few weeks. It has been a roller coaster of emotions that I've never felt before.

I'm on my way to Juba, South Sudan for my forth assignments with MSF. The second one after I got married and the first one after we had a baby.

And probably will be the last one.

After got married, I realize that I can't continue doing this-working as an aid worker in a far flung country. And so since I have decided to get married, it means that I have decided to settle down, build my own family and take care of them. It will be very hard to do--if not impossible--if I, as the head of the family is halfway around the world.

This is why this assignment has been very difficult for me. Not because it's South Sudan. Not because it will be in the middle of nowhere. Not because the country's at war. But because it's getting more difficult emotionally (and of course physically) to leave my family behind for quite some time.

They need me as much as I need them. And though there are so many unfortunate people all around the world that need medical care, there will always be another doctor, another nurse, another midwife for them while there's only me for my family.

So is this really really going to be the last one?

I. DON'T. KNOW.

My heart is torn to leave my family behind but also feels very bad for not being able to help those people in need. 

Comments

Popular Posts